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spankerellaOMG! LOL! Go. Read.
http://mctabby.livejournal.com/394006.html
I read these a lot, but this batch seems especially bad. Here are a few highlights from the first half of it:
Charlie Bucket dicovers he is not really a Bucket, but a Wonka. That his parents are really the most unlikely of couples, Willy Wonka and Sirius Black. And that he has a twin sister and he is a wizard.
Um… what?
Draco Malfoy has depleted his time as "Bachelor Extraordinaire". Lucius forces his hand to wed.
Just his hand? The rest of him is not married?
Harry is preparing for pole vaulting in olympics, and is trying to reassure himself that nothing can change. Except, Snape might be the only one that can tell Harry what is.
*Reads first part again* WTF!? Pole vaulting? Olympics? What?
Harry is tired of all the drama and grief around him - between the recovery of losses in the Last Battle and the regular trials and troubles of a teenager, Harry wants to run, run away, and never have to face this again. At least, he doesn't want to be human anymore - could life be any better as a turtle? Hermione turns him - and herself - into turtles, and Harry suddenly realizes he'd rather be human. The only way to get back to his normal self is to kiss his love, but it has to be of the same species....He doesn't love Hermione, does he?
Turtles? Could life be any better as a turtle? WTF? No, seriously... WTF?
Harry's a girl. The Wizarding World turns its back on Harri when Voldemort ties her magic to Lucius and she marries him but Harri is a multi spouse and needs a second husband. Who will she choose?
Oh. My. GOD! Noooooo! Is that Harri with a heart over the i?
Hermione gets a little drunk on her way to a bar and the next day finds herself in a bedroom next to the Slytherin Prince himself. what happend to her and why is she feeling "nausiated?"
She got drunk ON her way to the bar? Wow. Why am I suddenly feeling nauseated?
eta: OMFG! Laughing so hard I can't type. This has to be a joke...
It was the best of times, it was the worst of times. Gentle baby dinosaur sex cum falling like sweet rain on Harry's upraised face, menacing penile forests of wizardry.
http://mctabby.livejournal.com/394006.html
I read these a lot, but this batch seems especially bad. Here are a few highlights from the first half of it:
Charlie Bucket dicovers he is not really a Bucket, but a Wonka. That his parents are really the most unlikely of couples, Willy Wonka and Sirius Black. And that he has a twin sister and he is a wizard.
Um… what?
Draco Malfoy has depleted his time as "Bachelor Extraordinaire". Lucius forces his hand to wed.
Just his hand? The rest of him is not married?
Harry is preparing for pole vaulting in olympics, and is trying to reassure himself that nothing can change. Except, Snape might be the only one that can tell Harry what is.
*Reads first part again* WTF!? Pole vaulting? Olympics? What?
Harry is tired of all the drama and grief around him - between the recovery of losses in the Last Battle and the regular trials and troubles of a teenager, Harry wants to run, run away, and never have to face this again. At least, he doesn't want to be human anymore - could life be any better as a turtle? Hermione turns him - and herself - into turtles, and Harry suddenly realizes he'd rather be human. The only way to get back to his normal self is to kiss his love, but it has to be of the same species....He doesn't love Hermione, does he?
Turtles? Could life be any better as a turtle? WTF? No, seriously... WTF?
Harry's a girl. The Wizarding World turns its back on Harri when Voldemort ties her magic to Lucius and she marries him but Harri is a multi spouse and needs a second husband. Who will she choose?
Oh. My. GOD! Noooooo! Is that Harri with a heart over the i?
Hermione gets a little drunk on her way to a bar and the next day finds herself in a bedroom next to the Slytherin Prince himself. what happend to her and why is she feeling "nausiated?"
She got drunk ON her way to the bar? Wow. Why am I suddenly feeling nauseated?
eta: OMFG! Laughing so hard I can't type. This has to be a joke...
It was the best of times, it was the worst of times. Gentle baby dinosaur sex cum falling like sweet rain on Harry's upraised face, menacing penile forests of wizardry.
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no subject
Date: 2006-09-29 10:02 pm (UTC)"Friends don't let friends read bad fic."
Oy. o_0
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Date: 2006-09-29 10:53 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-09-29 11:04 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-09-29 11:33 pm (UTC)egads. i actually would be curious on how that one goes...
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Date: 2006-09-30 01:03 am (UTC)Oh, yeah. Some of that is pretty bad, lol! Okay, it's all pretty bad.
no subject
Date: 2006-09-30 02:35 am (UTC)My brain is bleeding. It's leaking out my ears.....
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Date: 2006-09-30 10:38 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-09-30 04:41 pm (UTC)Thats beyond bad. That's just worth of having the author taken out and shot for even thinking those two sentances. Further punihsment for thinking about typeing those out. Eternal shame and ebarassment for all eternity for posting that so I can laugh at it while scurbbing my brain with bleach.