well... I suck

[spankerella]

Well, I just got the reformat and first editing suggestions on "In Shadowside" back. I feel like shit now. I think I'll go curl up somewhere and cry for a little while. I know I shouldn't take it so personally, but... who the hell did I ever think I was that I could do this? I know I don't suck. The person even said I don't suck, but I feel like I suck as writer right now. There are so many things that need to be "changed". Most of it I agree with. But a few things made me upset. Obviously. I so should not have read a serious critique of the closest work to me first thing when I woke up.

I really do need to excuse myself to go cry about it now. Sorry for being such a big baby.

eta: I know I'm being ridiculous. Utterly ridiculous. I can take my lumps. I'm not looking for an ego soothe here. I just picked the wrong time to try to take my lumps, is all. I get upset about things... and a lot of the upset has to do with uncertainty in other aspects of my life. Then the one thing I thought I could count on... I doubt that now. I'm not a fortress. I'll buck up and do what needs to be done though. Just not today. It's just hard not to doubt yourself when you read a whole long email about how wrong you've been doing things.

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Comments

[lady-sylver.livejournal.com]

I haven't even heard of In Shadowside, but I know you're a very talented author. Beyond that, I haven't got much else to say.

*hugs you* You seem to need one of those.

Don't doubt your ift. I only wish I could write half as well as you do. It's been a dream of mine to be a recognised, published author my entire life, and I try, but YOU are the kind of author that real epics come from.

Keep on keeping on, hon. You'll be alright. And when your book hits the shelves, I'm buying it.